Freethinker slogans

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Latest revision as of 20:59, 9 August 2012

Here's a nifty list of funny bumper stickers, aphorisms or atheist slogans about religion

• No Jesus? Know Peace. Know Jesus? No Peace.

• Darwin loves you!

• Blasphemy is a victimless crime.

• Abstinence Makes the Church Grow Fondlers

• Honk If Your Religious Beliefs Make You An Asshole

• Don’t pray in my school, and I won’t think in your church.

• Intelligent Design Makes My Monkey Cry

• Thank God I'm an Atheist.

• Too Stupid to Understand Science? Try Religion.

• There's A REASON Why Atheists Don't Fly Planes Into Buildings

• If you think god is your co-pilot, try letting him land the plane.

• "Worship Me or I Will Torture You Forever. Have a Nice Day."­ God.

• If Jesus is inside me, I hope he likes fajitas ’cause that’s what he’s getting!

• Gods Don't Kill People. People Who Believe in God Kill People.

• If There is No God, Then What Makes the Next Kleenex Pop Up?

• He's Dead. It's Been 2,000 years. He's Not Coming Back. Get OVER It Already!

• All religion is simply evolved out of fraud, fear, greed, imagination, and poetry - Edgar Allan Poe.

• Viva La Evolución!

• Praying is begging

• Actually, If You Look It Up, The Winter Solstice Is The Reason For The Season

• I Wouldn't Trust Your God Even If He Did Exist

• Cheeses Is Lard. Argue With THAT If You Can.

• Cheeses Dried Foyer Shins. Praise the Lard.

• The difference between a cult and a religion is the amount of real estate controlled.

• People Who Don't Want Their Beliefs Laughed at Shouldn't Have Such Funny Beliefs

• Jesus is Coming? Don't Swallow That.

• Threatening Children With Hell Is FUN!

• GOD - APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!

• Jesus Told Me Republicans SUCK

• God + Whacky Tobacky = Platypus

• God Doesn't Exist. So, I Guess That Means No One Loves You.

• When the Rapture Comes, We'll Get Our Country Back!

• Q. How Do We Know the Holy Ghost Was Catholic? A. He Used the Rhythm Method Instead of a Condom.

• You Say "Heretic" Like It Was a BAD Thing

• And God said unto His followers, ‘Get on your knees and prey.’

• Creationism: Holy Shit!

• I Love Christians. They Taste Like Chicken.

• How many prophets does does it take to make a profit?

• Science: It Works, Bitches.

• "Intelligent Design" Helping Stupid People Feel Smart Since 1987

• I Found God Between The Sheets

• I Gave Up Superstitious Mumbo Jumbo For Lent

• My Flying Monkey Can Beat Up Your Guardian Angel

• Every Time You Play With Yourself, God Kills a Kitten

• If God Wanted People to Believe in Him, Then Why Did He Invent Logic?

• Praying Is Politically Correct Schizophrenia

• ALL Americans Are African Americans

• I Forget - Which Day Did God Make All The Fossils?

• I Was An Atheist Until The Hindus Convinced Me That I Was God

• The Spanish Inquisition: The Original Faith-based Initiative

• If we were made in his image, then why aren't humans invisible too?

• JESUS SAVES....You From Thinking For Yourself

• How Can You Disbelieve Evolution If You Can't Even Define It?

• Q. How Can You Tell That Your God is Man-made? A. If He Hates All the Same People You Do.

• Every Time You See a Rainbow, God is Having Gay Sex

• I Went to Public School in Kansas and All I Got Was This Lousy T-shirt and a Poor Understanding of the Scientific Method.

• WWJD = We Won. Jesus Died.
• WWJD = Who Would Jesus Date?
• WWJD = What Would Jesus Drive?
• WWJD = What Would Jesus Drink?

• Religion requires faith, science requires thinking.

• "Lighthouses are more useful than churches." Ben Franklin

• "The nearest I can make of it, Love your enemies means hate your friends." Ben Franklin

• "The way to see by Faith, is to shut the eye of Reason." Ben Franklin

• "If man is this evil with religion, then what would he be like without?" Ben Franklin

• Religion: the original pyramid scheme.

• The Family That Prays Together is Brainwashing the Children

• Oh, Look, Honey Another Pro-lifer For War

• Another Godless Atheist for Peace and World Harmony

• God is Unavailable Right Now. Can I Help You?

• When Lip Service to Some Mysterious Deity Permits Bestiality on Wednesday and Absolution on Sundays, Cash Me Out. Frank Sinatra.

• No Gods. No Mullets.

• When you kill one man you’re a murderer, a bunch you’re a psycho, thousand and you’re a hero, millions you’re a conqueror and if you kill them all… you are God!

• Transubstantiation: Just say no to cannibalism.

• Anything God can’t do we can do better.

• Atheist: a man who sells his soul to get money to give to the needy; theist; one who takes from the needy to protect his soul.

• Jesus may love you but everyone else thinks you're an asshole.

• Evangelical Agnostic: God? I don’t know and neither do you. God? I don’t care and neither should you.

• The clergy build castles in the sky; the religious live in them and the rest of us have to pay their rent.

• As an atheist, I condemn your religion, not you; now, do you condemn me?

• As an atheist, I am more compassionate than your God.

• Relax. We did not suffer before our births and we can't suffer when we're gone.

• I wouldn't send God to hell, if i could, but I would commit Him.

• If evil exists there is nothing that can be done about it, but if suffering is only caused by ignorance, then there is true hope.

• We think, therefore there is hope.

• Good does not require religion, but it is threatened by it.

• All religious extremism begins as religious moderation.

• Most religions preach tolerance until one of them gets the upper hand.

• A fool is guided by religion; the wise question it, and politicians abuse it.

• Faith is the refusal to see reality. Sanity is the insistence on reality.

• Believers made God in their image: violent and irrational.

• Jesus, save me from your followers.

• God was more than capable of judging people without help before you were born

• God hates you, and that's why he's letting you die.

• If people send each other to heaven/hell it is murder, but it is natural if God does it.

• I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ. -- Gandhi

• Have You Threatened Your Children With Eternal Damnation Today?

• Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.

• Christianity is to free inquiry what the Mafia is to free enterprise. -- George H. Smith

• A religious war is like children fighting over who has the strongest imaginary friend.

• The bible is an elaborate chain-letter and you fell for it!

• I went to the Creation Museum and all I got was stupider

Science flys you into outer space. Religion flys you into office space.

Don't want to go to hell? Become an atheist.

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